It should be no surprise that many people find divorce stressful. The end of your marriage can leave you with hurt feelings and challenging problems to solve. If you’re considering splitting up, it’s only natural to feel intimidated by these challenges.
However, they’re not insurmountable. If you’re prepared for the complications and stressors you’ll face, it’s possible to navigate your divorce with grace and efficiency. You can plan ahead for how you’ll avoid or overcome each problem. As a result, you’ll have a smoother split and be more prepared to move on when everything’s said and done.
While every divorce is different, some things are universal. Keep reading to learn five of the most significant stressors you should expect to face in your split and tips for handling them effectively.
1. Emotional Turmoil
Before anything else, the biggest challenge of divorce is managing your own emotions. Breaking up is hard to do. You may feel angry at your spouse for a perceived betrayal, you may be mourning the loss of your relationship, or you might just be overwhelmed at the amount of work before you. No matter how you feel, it’s an emotionally draining process.
Solution: Whenever you’re feeling overwhelmed in life, it’s a good idea to take some time for yourself. This is particularly true when you’re going through a divorce.
Try to give yourself at least a few minutes every day where you do things for no other reason than because you want to. If you can, reach out to your support network to get some help taking extra responsibilities off your shoulders. Acts of self-care like these will make it significantly easier to hold up to the strain of a divorce.
2. Remaining Civil
Alongside your general emotional distress, you may have a hard time interacting with your spouse. Staying civil with someone you used to love after the relationship has fallen apart is notoriously tricky. If you’re like many couples and have to remain under the same roof for part or all of your divorce, staying polite is even more essential yet even harder to accomplish.
Solution: The best way to remain professional around your soon-to-be-ex partner is to get some space. Don’t feel pressured to call or message them every day. If possible, one of you should move to another location, so you don’t need to spend every day tiptoeing around each other.
If you’re still living in the same home, treat them like a distant roommate and spend your downtime in separate rooms. The less you interact, the easier it will be to have polite discussions when you need to talk about things related to your divorce.
3. Financial Pressures
One of the most common stressors involved in most divorces is sudden financial pressure. One or both spouses are likely to face significantly lower household income. Even in high net worth splits, this reduction in funds can make you lose sleep at night if you’re worried about paying the bills.
Solution: During a divorce is a perfect time to set up a new budget and financial plan for your life. While it may be tempting to stick your head in the sand and ignore any financial worries you may have, it’s better to sort things out early, so you understand your situation. If you’re particularly concerned or you have a complicated financial life, you can reach out to a financial advisor to help you set up a new plan and budget.
4. Difficult Negotiations
At its core, divorces are all about negotiation. The actual act of ending a marriage is simple: a judge signs some documents that declare you and your former partner legally single. It’s splitting up everything else that’s complicated.
You’ll need to negotiate issues like who gets which assets, whether either of you will receive alimony, and if you have children, how their care will be divided. These negotiations can be painful no matter what kind of relationship you have with your ex. You’re splitting up your life, after all.
Solution: The best way to handle stressful negotiations is to work with a qualified divorce attorney. They can help you reach a fair agreement without needing to spend hours arguing with your ex.
Good lawyers will also act as a go-between, helping you significantly reduce the amount of time you need to spend near your former partner. Suppose your partner is being uncooperative or actively hostile. In that case, your attorney can also help shield you from their behavior by reducing the number of in-person meetings you need to attend.
5. Slow-Moving Processes
Many divorces can feel like they drag on forever. The timeline can extend even further if you face complicated negotiations or an uncooperative spouse. Should your split feel like it’s caught in limbo, every step seeming to take multiple meetings and weeks of time, it’s easy to worry that you’re trapped in a years-long process with no resolution in sight.
Solution: Any split can be resolved quickly if you have the right help. Working with an experienced divorce lawyer gives you the resources you need to speed things on their way. Your attorney should help you take decisive action. If they aren’t, you should consider getting a new lawyer who’s prepared to move things along.
Legal Assistance Can Help You Handle Your Divorce With Grace
There’s no need to handle your split alone. In fact, the more help you get, the easier it will be to wrap things up quickly and efficiently and start moving on with your life. When it comes to minimizing the challenges you face in a divorce, the best thing you can do for yourself is to get experienced legal representation.
You can start the process by getting in touch with top California divorce lawyers at Flicker, Kerin, Kruger & Bissada LLP. Their decades of experience and knowledge will help you resolve your divorce with less stress. Schedule your consultation today so you can stop worrying about your split sooner.